Shoes, everyone wears them. Well, not everybody. However, if shoe manufacturers would get it right, most likely they would. Now, don't give us the same old crap. Give us something that would "WOW" us. Like a pair of sneakers fit for carrying bowling balls to the gym. Or sandals that make crazy geese honks as the wearer walks down the street. Or how about boots that sense when you need to go to the bathroom even before you do? Wouldn't that be splendid? Then, you wouldn't have to worry about being milked by the next pit stop at the bus station! Oh! Or a pair of loafers that slap the jimmies out of the next person that cuts in front of you while you're standing in line for a dozen marbles. And let's not forget about the wedges that give you upward mobility when you really need a lift onto that ostrich hiding up in your skirt somewhere. God have mercy!